DELIVERENCE

This is hard for me to talk about dear friends. Something horrifying yet somehow cleansing has happened to me. I guess it was just a matter of time before something like this happened. I never believed it would of course and I didn’t see it coming but sometimes the truth hits you right between the eyes and you just cannot ignore it. It is a bittersweet epiphany and I must rely honestly on my conviction of objectivity as I reveal this to you, my valued and respected friends, family and colleagues;

After serious introspective soul searching, I have decided to wholeheartedly embrace and support liberalism, the Occupy movement people and everything they stand for. Please forgive me.

I can’t explain why it took me so long to see the light. I guess I just got caught up in the heartless and radical right wing hater mindset and became blinded to the real truth. But it’s here now and I must go about repairing the damage that has been done to me. I can see now how others have been responsible for my failures and shortcomings and more importantly how others have failed to provide for me and take care of me. It’s simply a matter of figuring out how this happened to me in the first place and then take all necessary steps to make sure others do not wonder aimlessly down the same path. It’s all about righting this wrong, accepting the fact that I have been a victim my whole life and go about moving forward. It is nothing short of a catharsis for me and I can already feel the weight of principled living and personal responsibility lifting away from my very being. I am saved!

As a starting point for my rebirth I must be honest with myself and seek to confront the origins of my development and how I came to be such a radical. I’m sorry Mom and Dad, but I know what you did to me now. How could you!

Of course it all makes perfect sense when you look back at it. How could I have been so blind? How could I have been so thoroughly deceived by these diabolical people whom I loved and trusted? And you……my mother and father, wasted precious little time implementing your scheme! 

I was just a little boy when you gave me a quarter to go buy a 5 cent candy bar at the store. When I returned and told you with a straight face that the price of candy bars had suddenly shot up to 25 cents, you did not just accept the fact that I was entitled to the other 20 cents; you forced a confession out of me and followed up with a punishment that taught me the value of honesty. That’s right mom and dad, its all coming back to me now and you are not getting away with it. It didn’t end there either.

I was 10 years old when I told you I wanted a new baseball mitt. You had the unmitigated gall to suggest I get some lawn mowing jobs in the neighborhood and earn the money for myself! Holy crap! If I had known then the truth, that I actually deserved to have the mitt and shouldn’t have to work for it, then I could have spent more time watching TV and playing in the park with my friends. It’s so very hard to relive this all over again, but it’s not over……

My high school trigonometry teacher caught me cheating on a test and called you. You took me aside when I got home and verbally chewed me a new pooper. You reminded me about the importance of character and honesty, hard work and integrity and the most ridiculous one of all, self respect. Huh? You made me apologize to the teacher and challenged me to work harder. What a fool I was! My schoolmate had the right answers to the test. Although he was the one who stayed up late studying to excel on test day, it turns out I had the right to have whatever answers he had. How greedy and selfish the system was for not re-distributing all the correct answers to everyone in the class so we all got straight A’s! And you, my parents, acted as co-conspirators in this egregious act of class warfare! But the worst is yet to come…..

I was completely duped into believing that I had to spend every summer of my college years working full time to pay for school. While others just took out massive student loans, went to Hawaii and took fun summer trips to various exotic locations, I was working my tail off to have enough money for tuition and some food. Now I realize that college should have been free for me! I was completely flamboozled into believing that I was responsible for making my own way in life and creating a future for myself. Boy oh boy mom and dad, you must have a couple of real good laughs when you realized I bought that BS philosophy hook line and sinker. It’s not so funny now is it! I’ll never get those summers back…sniff. Oh…..but you needed help here and there to complete your little project….

Every sports coach I ever had, many teachers and people whom I admired during my programming experience were all in on it. They told me to always strive for excellence, to be the best. I was convinced by these charlatans that I should push myself hard, make sacrifices and set goals. And what happened when I had some success? Oh sure….I received a few accolades, a plaque here, a trophy there and an occasional feeling of accomplishment. HA! How could I have known back then that it was all a façade? How was I to know that we were all the same and we all should have gotten a trophy! Boy do I feel like Mcfly getting whapped upside my head by Biff.

And to all you employers who made me work for minimum wage or less. Forcing me stand in rat infested rice fields pulling weeds, scraping dry Mexican food off plates and scrubbing grills. Busing tables at the college restaurant during my one hour lunch break. It continued into my career also. My first Employer made me work grave yard shifts and Sundays, brow beat me into staying late on weekdays and intimidated me into following a code of conduct and grooming standards. You bastards! I’ll just never forgive any of you. All it would have taken was for just one of you to take me aside and let me know what was really going on. A note tucked into my pocket, an anonymous phone call, something! Twenty six years of doing the job right, twenty six years of punctuality, excellence, faithful devotion and sacrifice. Not one of you told me the truth! Not one! And now I am told by the emperor that I am wealthy and I am to give my money to others who don’t have as much. You made me evil!

It’s not difficult to see how I came to be this dysfunctional and radical. I never had a chance. I was never exposed to the real truth and when it came to me in the form of network news or from respected community leaders like Jesse Jackson, Barbara Boxer, Nancy Pelosi, Barbara Steisand, Jane Fonda, Michael Moore, Whoopi Goldberg, Al Sharpton and even the emperor, I ignored them. I put my head in the sand because it hurt. It was damn lies. I could not come to grips with the reality that my whole life to this point had been a sham.

Well they can’t hurt me anymore. I’ve had it. I plan on pitching a tent in my parent’s front yard, (if they’ll lend me one) and start my own occupation! If you feel you have been similarly victimized by the same mind altering indoctrination join my movement and occupy your parent’s yard! Use their landscaping as a latrine; threaten to kill their grass if they don’t feed you, let them know the gig is up and you want retribution! It’s ours for the taking! Gawd this feels good!

I must go now. I still have to quit my job, cancel my medical and life insurance, shred my mortgage bill and find out what the neighbors are making me for dinner.